Expanding Waistlines and Voluntary Poisoning


A couple family members, friends, and  colleagues have commented and  questioned how after making all these sweets and baked goods, my husband and I haven’t gained weight. At which point I just smile and explain that we share with others.

And well….it’s true. But, we also have gained weight at an approximate rate of 0.2 pounds per post. And this is post…uh….what….42? You can do the math. In all honesty I feel like I’m having my own “Super Size Me” type experiment. If only I had thought this out better before I started. This should be a movie not a blog!!!

What I find most ironic is that this time last year, we were eating healthy trying to slim down for our wedding and I was reading a book on brain health and how sleep, diet, and exercise effect the chemistry of your brain. The book was a bit of a downer. Turns out sugar isn’t good for you. Wait! Stop the press! Sugar is bad for you? You mean the rumors are true? I’m no expert…..but, I believe the rumors are true. They say it causes premature aging too. Eeeek! All I can say for sure is that this time last year, I was about 8-9 lbs lighter, my skin and hair looked healthier, I felt good, energetic, strong, and I craved rich buttery foods (sweet or savory) enough to give me an additional reason to look forward to my wedding. I know what you’re thinking….”wait a minute. That last one doesn’t sound like a good thing.” I’m just trying to be honest. While I’m being honest I may as well admit that crossing back over to the dark side of white flour, white sugar, and rich buttery foods isn’t as easy as you would think. Despite all my cravings my stomach had lost a bit of its strength and ability to tolerate these delectable poisons. But my stomach and I managed to make it through the tough times and can now digest these poisons like champions. Yay?

All this to say, my husband wants to do a 4 day anti-bloating cleans/diet that we used to kick off our healthy eating last year. This means that in 2-3 days I will be rolled up on the couch with a headache and feeling sleepier than sleepy.
The way I see it, there are two kinds of bloating 1. Water retention 2. Gassy bloating. And these 4 days are dedicated to trying to avoid things that promote either type of bloating.

Examples of Water Retaining  Culprits

  • Excess carbohydrates – especially refined carbs
  • Caffeine (this is where the headache and sleepiness come in)
  • Salt

Examples of Gassy Bloating Culprits

  • Eating fast
  • Spicy foods
  • Raw veggies
  • Dairy
  • Fried or fatty foods

So what does that leave? Water, plain steamed vegetables, unsalted nuts and seeds, and lean low sodium  meats. I know what you’re thinking now. “Yum!!!!!”


Sigh… Its surprisingly filling (in a “i can’t eat anymore bland raw sunflower seeds” sort of way)


No comment


Much more bland than it looks (1 part lactose and fat free milk 1 part fruit)


Dinner is ok. The biggest problem is that it isn’t followed with dessert 😦

But hey, it’s only 4 days and after that we can go back to eating a little more responsibly than we have been in hopes to eliminate the 0.2 pound per post weight increase.

In the mean time, I’ll be making and freezing doughs. Either that or rolled up on the couch going through withdrawals, coffee and sugar deprived. One day down, three to go.


2 comments on “Expanding Waistlines and Voluntary Poisoning

  1. That sounds like a bit of a drag, but I understand the motivation. I always feel better when I cut refined sugar from my diet. It does creep back in though, insidious little bugger.

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